social/facebook

Well this is freaking me out. Let me explain. This app (Crystal) purports to help you write better emails to colleagues (etc) by essentially creating a psych evaluation of them based on their social media presence, and then recommending to you the most PERSUASIVE ways of interacting with them based on their profile. It can even go so far as to check the content of emails as you write them, and suggest changes targeted towards persuading (manipulating?) the recipient.

What. the. actual. fuck?

Let’s take a look at what it says you should do to persuade me.

http://i.imgur.com/6CAF6eJ.jpg

Well, I’m flattered that it thinks you should “use an emoticon :)” when emailing me. And I appreciate the advice to not “ask him to explain something in detail”, that sure makes my life easier. I’m not sure how to take the idea that it comes naturally to me to “forget something important” (probably true), but I think I’ll take it as complement that when speaking to me, “don’t trust that he will follow specific verbal instructions”.. that’s right. bitch, I do what I want.

If anyone is interested in finding out how they are best persuaded (manipulated?), and you have a LinkedIn account, let me know and I’ll generate the profile for you and send it your way. The free trial lasts two weeks I think. Note that I have already done this for: William Elder Matthew James Simonson Margie Hannum Andy Brunner Christian Montoya with interesting results. Prepare to be persuaded! 0_0